On Shifts and Sheaths

I am way too old to take the “wee-hours-of-the-morning” shift for a cat who must have spent one of his lives as a howling baby.


L.B. was diagnosed recently with an extreme form of diabetes, and he is not having an easy time coping. Because of his excessive thirst—our first sign of the onset of the illness—, L.B. awakens every day at 3:00 a.m. and howls or bays at the moon. He does not wish to drink water from any of the ceramic bowls stationed around the house. No, L.B. wants me to turn on the faucet in the sink of the master bathroom (L.B. IS the master) so that he can sit in the sink and let the water splash around him. Did I mention that he likes to perform this routine at 3:00 a.m.?

I am so tired that I cannot see straight, and I find that, while stationed dutifully by L.B.’s side, my mind wanders. Last night, I fantasized that I had splurged on this Elie Tahari shift/sheath that I saw at Neiman Marcus. What Cat Lady could resist the extra touch of the leopard-print midriff? At this rate, a snorkeling suit might be more appropriate.


Query of the Day: Is No-Doze still on the market?